It’s my birthday today. I can’t exactly put “Happy” before “Birthday” in the title because I’m not having a happy day.

I’m having a very strange, surreal, sad day. My father is fading before our eyes, but so, so peacefully and every now and then a huge great smile appears on his face.

I awoke this morning to find myself in a flat with my two brothers and my parents – it took me back about 40 years – I had completely regressed. It’s very strange to be spending my birthday away from my children, but this morning when I went in to see my father and he held my hand up to his face and kissed it and whispered “Happy Birthday” to me, there was nothing in the world I wanted more for my birthday than to hear him say that.

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18 Comments
Family Affairs

Navigating single parenting and life in London, supported by wine, theatre, travelling and friends.

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18 Comments
  • Eclipse
    November 11, 2010

    … Birthday to you x

    Reply
    • Family Affairs
      November 11, 2010

      Thx Claire – in fact, now you say it back to me, I like “Birthday to you” Lx

      Reply
  • Expat Mum
    November 11, 2010

    Oh poo – I’m crying. Bless you and your dad in all of this. So hard, and yet you’re with him and that’s where you should be.
    Happy Birthday.
    x

    Reply
  • libby
    November 11, 2010

    Priceless..just priceless. The love that surrounds you all at the moment.

    Reply
  • TheMadHouse
    November 11, 2010

    Justto let you know that I am reading, no words

    Reply
  • Dumdad
    November 11, 2010

    Bon anniversaire! What a lovely gesture from your dad. I hope the next year sees you thrive and conquer.

    Reply
  • Jon Storey
    November 11, 2010

    Best wishes on your birthday Lulu, and wishing your father every peace and comfort in the time ahead.

    Reply
  • janelle
    November 11, 2010

    oh lulu….thinking of you and sending all thoughts and warm embraces…xxx j

    Reply
  • Sam
    November 11, 2010

    Oh God …no words either. Just big fat tears and huge love x

    Reply
  • Anna
    November 11, 2010

    Birthday to you and many hugs from us all.

    Reply
  • Miranda
    November 12, 2010

    Made me cry! Happy birthday. So glad your dad is peaceful. xxx

    Reply
  • auntiegwen
    November 12, 2010

    Much love xxx

    Reply
  • Shiny
    November 12, 2010

    Made me cry too. Birthday to you xx

    Reply
  • Julie C
    November 12, 2010

    Thinking of you on your Birthday, treasure your last moments with your Father. xx

    Reply
  • Ms P
    November 12, 2010

    Not much to say, other than I’m thinking of you & your family. Happy belated birthday. Am pleased that you are where you should be and hope you are all supporting one another. xx

    Reply
  • Jan Lennie
    November 13, 2010

    ((((hugs))))))xxx

    Reply