“No man should go through life without once experiencing healthy, even bored solitude in the wilderness, finding himself depending solely on himself and thereby learning his true and hidden strength”. Jack Kerouac.
We discussed just this idea on Saturday night. Several of the men, clearly in the grip of their midlife crisis wanted to go and climb a mountain. Several of the wives married to these men were encouraging them to do just that on the proviso that they accidentally fall off the edge and never return. Others found the thought of a week alone to be terrifying and pointless. Personally, as long as I was somewhere where I felt safe I would LOVE it. I could write and think and sleep and write some more and enjoy the peace and quiet – I would probably want to come home before the week had ended mind you.
It occurred to me that those of us hitting middle age could perhaps do with stepping out of our own lives completely and utterly for a week and taking the time to reassess all that is important to us:- our path, our dreams, our hopes, our navel. Spending some time looking at the bigger picture and thinking about the quintessential questions of life – “why are we here” and “what mark will I make on the planet?” type questions, would quite possibly uncover the “true and hidden strengths” that Jack Kerouac is referring to. I think we could learn a lot about ourselves and possibly change the things we have become unhappy with in a relatively positive way. Maybe it also might resolve the problem of affluenza so widely experienced in Western civilisation by reducing the “taking things for granted” aspect of life.
Perhaps it should be a government run initiative. Perhaps we should all have to do it. What do you think?
Anna
May 29, 2008I don’t know about the government being involved – in Russia they used to send the young and the not so young to pick potatoes in the fields and sort vegetable and fruit in the freezing industrial warehouses. That was a must. Did it lead to refection? Yes, about how one could escape to the West.
Seriously, though, it’s a great idea, but it has to be voluntary. I spent three days at a Cistercian abbey in Quebec some time ago, it was wonderful. Everything is by a melodic bell, and you can’t speak, only exchange glances with other guests.
I could have stayed for a month.
family affairs
May 29, 2008What a great idea…although I’m not sure I would cope with not speaking x
jaz
May 29, 2008Found your site via The Daily Telegraph article on May 2oth. Hugely great timing as husband of 17 years annouced today that he was leaving the family nest. I have scrolled down your blog and have to say the Relate counselling you experienced is distubing me somewhat! He is out on town tonight as he is in too ‘fragile a state of mind to talk’ and when he returns is going to let me know if he is up for counselling sessions. You write brilliantly, what more can I say but thank you.
family affairs
May 29, 2008Oh no…I’m so sorry to hear that Jaz -…maybe you don’t have one. No, Relate counselling wasn’t great for me but everything is worth trying – ring up and put your name down anyway – there will no doubt be a waiting list so you can decide when a space appears.
Expatmum
May 29, 2008Funny – I have found I’m going the other way. I don’t really worry about the legacy I leave or my meaning in life etc. anymore because it’s too much to worry about and may not end up being anything in the long run. Not that I’m leading a hedonistic life at all (by heck, I’m not) I just try not to make too much of it.
Janelle
May 29, 2008morning lulu! yeah. in africa you take yourself to The Bush…immerse yourself in nature..or a remote beach somewhere…stay in a grass shack. or a tent. get back to basics. get persepctive from the stars at night…and yes. read PunkRock Mummy. did me in too. stole my silly words and made me cry. sent it too lots of my friends. still think you write like a genius though. take care x j
family affairs
May 30, 2008Maybe then, Expat mum there is a correlation here between being lost and found, or content and confused….x
Thanks Janelle, “yes stole my words” is a good description – extraordinary. But thanks for the lovely compliment anyway x
Casdok
May 30, 2008People take much for granted, so i think its a great idea!
family affairs
June 1, 2008PS – Jaz if you drop in again – half my sentence disappeared – what I meant to say was I can’t reach your blog – maybe you don’t have one – not just “maybe you don’t have one” – how’s it going? Lx