FAMILY AFFAIRS UPDATE

I’ve been feeling the need to post a Family Affairs update, which I haven’t done for ages.  When I was made redundant back in May, I immediately launched myself into working on my new career as a Reformer Pilates teacher and then I had my back operation, so I haven’t had much to talk about or time to write!  Now things seem to be opening up a little, before we head into yet another manic period, so I’m taking a moment to write it all down.

We’ve been having the most spectacularly busy time, what with one thing and another and it’s (mainly) all been BRILLIANT.  I had hoped that having my back operation at the end of the summer would mean that I’d be party-ready by November and it worked!  My back survived all the standing and all the dancing we’ve been doing and it’s bearing up well (thankfully my daughter stopped me from attempting the late night limbo dancing, which was wise of her).

November was a riot of parties – my good friend’s birthday, my daughters birthday, my son’s engagement party, my BIG birthday (which involved more than a week of celebrations), my niece’s 13th birthday and it’s now all just slowly starting to bleed into various Christmas celebrations and it’s finally time to take my birthday cards down and put up the Xmas decorations.

So my Family Affairs update:-

ME
Been drinking a lot of champagne – here at my friend’s birthday catch up in early November:-

My festivities included a wonderful potato party for all my close girlfriends:-

I’ve already written separately about our River Café night out, but here’s a favourite pic of the night:-

Had I still been married, celebrations would have also included our 35th wedding anniversary this week.  An actual lifetime…but that was not to be.  We signed off on our marriage after 15 years – which at the time, also felt like an actual lifetime.  I still give a nod and a sentimental thought to our wedding day on our anniversary where we were united in a Hammersmith church, whilst I was wearing my thermals.  It’s strange to think that I’ve actually been divorced for longer than I was married, considering that I don’t really give the divorced bit any specific thought at all.  20 years of single parenting, 20 years of managing and juggling our lives on my own.  Admittedly there were a few periods of time when I chose to let someone else in – but mostly that involved more work and general hindrance than any additional help and support.  It feels like a pretty big deal to still be happily living alone with my youngest son and my cat.  I actually no longer have any desire to change anything or to go back to the person I was all those years ago.  The journey has been very dramatic, but from my old birds-eye perspective, standing in my much smaller turret, it’s all calm and we’re all happy.  Of course everything is temporary, which is why this current state of being deserves it’s own moment of celebration.  It just goes to show that sometimes, when life turns to shit and you cannot ever imagine being happy again, it’s often a matter of choosing a new path and after the dust settles (but ideally get on with life whilst it’s settling), that very often you wake up one morning to discover that you’ve found a better way to live.  Your life, your way.  It’s very liberating and powerful to choose your own path.

It’s been a month since my birthday and I’ve been quietly getting about London using my old person’s travel card, which has been a little bit traumatic but also quite joyful to get all that free travel!  Thus far I don’t feel too old and certainly not gorgeous, but I saw this sign and liked it’s messaging.  I will use it as a reminder to not feel that getting to the ripe old age of 60 is anything at all these days:-

I have also proudly put up this poster in my kitchen, given to me by my oldest friend for my birthday – we’ve been dancing in the kitchen since the children could walk:-

Then I went round to help my brother turn his kitchen into an actual glitterball by lining the walls with tin foil in preparation for my niece’s launch into her teens:-

We’ve already been to my old Hong Kong school friend’s Xmas gathering in a pub in Soho:-

OLDEST SON

He proposed on the 16th November and we couldn’t be happier. I love my soon-to-be daughter-in-law, who’s been around for over 12 years now. She’s kind, clever, gorgeous, funny and they just get each other. So we have a wedding to look forward to next year! So exciting.

The happy couple at their engagement party:-

Here she is with me and my daughter:-

Shortly after their announcement and impromptu engagement party they flew off to Sri Lanka and had an amazing time:-

Here they are hiking and protecting their legs from the leeches:-

MIDDLE DAUGHTER

She turned 29 in November. My beautiful little pea-in-the-pod best friend. She’s doing great things in her NHS world and working super hard. We had a great day on her actual birthday, shopping for some new clothes and then celebrating in the evening:-

YOUNGEST SON

He’s doing really well in his job and generally loving life. I’m sure he’s keen to move out (if he could afford it) but for now I’m still enjoying having him at home. He does an annual Xmas meal for 7 mates – which typically involves making the most god awful mess that takes days to clear up.  This time he managed to basically throw chicken fat around the whole kitchen as he removed them from the oven.  It sloshed everywhere – all over the hob, in the drawers, on the floor….BUT you know what?  It’s got to be done.  As a parent, you have to let go of the control and let them make a mess and enjoy themselves.  He cooked the entire meal himself and did all the clearing up too.  It’s a life skill that hopefully at some point in the near future he can enjoy in someone else’s house!

Chickens upside down, but who cares!  They all turn up in their Xmas jumpers with Secret Santa pressies and enjoy the night:-

Just look what he produced singlehandedly:-

Classic boy sized portions:-

OUR CAT

Our wonderful cat is now 14 years old.  The sweetest animal ever and he mainly stays by my side all day long when I’m at home – staring at me like this:-

OUTSIDE

Always love a wintry walk into the park – especially when the sky is so blue!-

INSIDE

I get a lot of joy from my indoor plants and especially this hibiscus plant that just keeps flowering:-

Well, that’s quite enough for now! Just a lovely, happy all round update and long may it last. I have a few friends who will be very glad to see the back of 2024 for various reasons and I’m really thinking about them. It makes you realise that life is just so very precious and we need to find the joy…it’s relatively rare for me to have so much happy news so I wanted to note it all down!