It’s been a month now that I’ve had this horrid dizzy thing and been bouncing off walls. Having been diagnosed with Labyrinthitis or Benign Postural Vertigo I’ve been getting myself ready to take it to stage 2 – blood tests, specialists and so on because teaching last week was a nightmare….I have been demanding sympathy all round because I was clearly dealing with the early stages of some hideous terminal illness.
But then today I am delighted to report a major breakthrough. Annoyingly, it is all thanks to my mother. She of the white witch form of medicine – knows everything there is to know about medicine and has weird tinctures and treatments for anything and everything. Last time I was with her, being dizzy, she chased me around with a teaspoon of warm olive oil – “don’t be ridiculous” I kept telling her “you can’t treat a brain tumour with olive oil – I need antibiotics, surgery, modern medicine”. Every time I spoke to her on the phone she told me to go and put warm oil in my ear, “preferably with a grapefruit spoon” (WHO in life has GRAPEFRUIT SPOONS in their drawer apart from my parents?).
But anyway, I duly did what I was told and then went to the Dr this morning to have the entire contents of my brain hoovered out through my ear via a jet stream of warm water – otherwise known as having your ears syringed. An unpleasant but strangely comforting experience (obviously not for the Dr – which is probably why he told me a month ago I had a virus – anything to avoid that job).
AND GUESS WHAT? I appear to be cured!! I have done lots of lying down and getting up and putting my head upside down and nope….no balance problems or dizziness thus far. This is a huge relief for the future of my career as a teacher of balance. I find it odd that it wasn’t the obvious first port of call – although the Dr did tell me that I had teeny weeny eustachian tubes and that it was impossible to see my ear drums – shame nobody’s ever said that about any of my other orifices!
Brother no. 1
September 10, 2010Glad to hear u r better but it is unfortunate our mother had to hit on the cure. She will be unbearable…..
Family Affairs
September 10, 2010I KNOW!! It’s a disaster. I’ll never hear the end of it……Lx
'm'
September 10, 2010Mmmm…so ear wax then – bugger all those technical medical terms – you had ear wax, short and simple, ear wax….lol…but glad ur better…better go and have a drink or ten to celebrate! x
Family Affairs
September 11, 2010Well, yes. I know. It’s not clever. Or cool. To. Have. Ear. Wax. I know that but i thought maybe it was time that someone came out and confessed because actually it’s really not that bad and more people than you think have it. I imagine. Although I don’t actually know because it’s not something you discuss in public. Lx
Expat Mum
September 10, 2010So what your basically telling us is that you haven’t been cleaning your ears. At all, but the sound of things.
Family Affairs
September 11, 2010I CAN”T clean my ears – I have teeny weeny eustachian tubes – impossible to clean. Cute though. Lx
Family Affairs
September 11, 2010BTW – I wrote about thinking my teeny weeny eustachian tubes were “cute” quite late last night. what a strange thing to say – sorry x
Imo
September 11, 2010My parents have those pointy grapefruit spoons too !
janelle
September 11, 2010yay! simple little old fashioned cures….i LOVE getting my ears syringed…! xxx j
Family Affairs
September 11, 2010That’s weird xx