My “Live Love Laugh” lifestyle mantra is being severely curtailed by a number of things. Mainly, real life, which doesn’t always naturally fit in to any of the above categories.
I can give you two examples for this. One is that anyone with a proper lifestyle blog posts photos of gorgeous shoes a lot. I’ve seen them and I always want them. Instead, here is the photo I recently took of my footwear. “Dressed by BA survival kit”…I look like a smurf:-
The second example is the latest problem: Exams.
Hasn’t anybody ever considered in the field of education how stressful exams are for the parents? They were clearly invented by people who don’t yet have children, because seriously, if they did have kids they wouldn’t put themselves through it. At this point (nearly the end) my daughter has had to move from AS level exams to end of year exams and I am seriously ready to suggest that she leaves school and becomes a Milk Maid (no offence to Milk Maids if they still exist and have degrees now and are called things like “Lactating Facilitator’s” or something equally gender appropriate these days).
I can’t tell you. It’s like trying to tightrope walk across gossamer threads made by a teeny weeny spider, precariously placed just above a yawning chasm – you have to try endless different tactics to keep them (and yourself) from going into total meltdown mode. I haven’t got the formula right though. Endless cups of tea can help. Chocolate and sweets definitely help. Fizzy drinks are requested but not ideal. Presents are good but I don’t see why I should buy presents for a demented person living in my house.
What I am dying to know is whether all those requests I have been making for the last few months are going to be honoured once the exams are over – you know the ones “do you think you could move your stuff from the stairs please/put your clothes away/put the lid on the Marmite?” that only ever get a “NO OF COURSE I CAN’T – I’M REVISING FOR AN EXAM NEXT WEDNESDAY CAN’T YOU SEE?
Maybe it’s a girl thing. Because my firstborn boy was never this stressed. Having said that he was so laid back he had to retake his exams. Third child (12 year old boy) has also started end of year exams today. He insists that he can’t use flashcards or write notes like I keep suggesting because “it doesn’t work like that with me – nothing goes in – I think I might be dyslexic do you think you can speak to the school and see if I can get extra time and a laptop?” So instead, he shows me a clip from The Inbetweeners that he thinks is hilarious about revision and then simply stares at the page, before getting up to go to the loo, go for a run, check Facebook, try a little bit of juggling he saw recently using a glass (it didn’t work – smashed everywhere) and then went off for a bath because revising in the bath is apparently the best place for him and I am really wondering whether anything is going in at all. We shall see.
I rushed back from work today to welcome my firstborn son back from university and guess what? He was asleep on the sofa. Which was quite a bonus really considering he could have been out catching up with friends and I’ve just cooked a meal that was about 8 sizes too small for him and he now appears to be eating my chairs. It’s so lovely to have him back and I’m relishing that thought, because I know that my maternal joy is going to be stretched because he is now home for about half a year and I’m not even joking. His summer finishes in October.