PERFECTION

OK so there might be quite a lot of things that are not quite right in my life at the moment – things that I wasn’t expecting to have to deal with when I was busy planning my life path all those years ago, but, as a number of friends have commented in my “Little Boat of Life” post of a few days ago (I had no idea how many wonderful life analogies can you get out of using boat imagery) there are an awful lot of things in my life that are right at the moment. I am fully aware that there are many many things that I have to be thankful for and I am trying to spend more time living in the moment. My friend pointed out that we are generally too busy trying to anticipate the future and being defined by our past to actually enjoy the here and now. Spending time luxuriating in what you are actually doing makes time go a little bit more slowly I find. Which is another crucial element of getting older….

Janelle, my old blog friend in Tanzania wrote that “every moment could be more perfect but the trick is to embrace the perfection that already exists – not to search for more now. Rest in it. Absorb it. Then she quoted Cyril Connolly, ‘The Unquiet Grave’ “…a rune for the very bored: When very bored say to yourself: It was during the next 20 minutes that there occurred one of those tiny incidents which revolutionizes the whole course of our life and alters the face of history. Truly, we are the playthings of enormous fates…” Then she says “flip and what the hell do i know hey? lots love…..just keep on keeping on the best way you know how. laugh a lot? xxxxx”

ANYWAY. The point is, that today I am feeling very happy and grounded and supremely smug with my lot in life. So in the spirit of embracing the perfection that already exists it is time to show you the card by youngest son made me for my birthday. He’s moved on from hand drawn cards and onto Moonpig expensively designed cards, but nevertheless a lot of thought and attention and forward planning went into what he did (before you need your sick bag – can I just say that if firstborn is reading this post then WHERE IS MY BLOODY BIRTHDAY CARD??)…

It is when you receive a gift like this, from someone you have actually produced out of your own body, who you love unconditionally forever, who you didn’t force to write lovely words in a card, who you hope will always feel like this about his mother, but probably won’t because things change and I hope I will live long enough to begin to piss him off but hopefully not (piss him off, not live long enough), who is still so very young, who has all that life to live, that you feel so very happy and proud to be the recipient of something so utterly divine.

Wouldn’t you agree? OK, so he got my age wrong and had to put stickers all over the place to cover up the fact that he’d got it wrong but never mind!

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