Hello. Quick update from Cape Town ….
We arrived on Friday morning and the weather was so appalling that the taxi driver took to pointing out Table Mountain and trying to describe the shape to us – you couldn’t see it at all.
It’s gorgeous this morning though and we’re going off to the Peninsula to the point where the two seas meet and to see the penguins.
Yesterday we watched my son get beaten at rugby against a Township school. It was an amazing game to watch. The crowd were very enthusiastic and I’ve got some great photos.
I’ve been feeling very torn however about divided loyalties and all that…last night was the final rugby dinner with speeches et al for my son and I’d flown all the way here to see him but my father had booked dinner at “The Mount Nelson Hotel” – he’d booked it months ago and when asked if it was a special occasion he said “most definitely – we will be celebrating the fact that one of my son’s didn’t drown in your pond”. Amazingly, when we went outside to look at the pond, I remembered the event!! It all looked so familiar – I don’t think I realised at the time that he nearly drowned though – although I certainly remember him looking a bit bedraggled – as per normal my parents were busy drinking elsewhere – sometimes I really do wonder how any of us got to adulthood.
I figured that the rugby dinner and my son wouldn’t miss us too much and anyway my ex-husband was there with my other two children and I am sort of treading on his holiday with the children. The issue really, I suppose is just about struggling with the enormity of being separated from the children. It’s so strange to be in the same country and they’re in a different hotel. So very hard for the kids I feel – “forlorn” is the way my father described us all saying our goodbyes last night….
Even worse is that I had hoped to see them all for dinner tonight and last night my ex told me that his girlfriend is arriving this morning so will be there. Somehow the thought of my children with them – looking like a gorgeous happy family is almost more than I can bear.
SORRY. This isn’t meant to be about my emotional struggle and about why, if you’re ever thinking about divorce, you should seriously think again. It’s just too painful. Although being in a foreign country I guess everything gets highlighted tenfold…I’m meant to be writing about where we’ve been and what we’re doing.
It’s an extraordinary experience for my father, being in Cape Town again – he’s finding the whole white supremacy issue and how everything has changed fascinating – I mean last time he was here there would have only been white people sitting next to him in bars.
My time is about to run out so I’m going to sign off now – I’ll come back later hopefully when I’m feeling a bit more positive!!
Mud in the City
August 2, 2009Fab, fab, fab! I know seeing your ex's GF is going to be hideous – but being able to explore the past and the present with your father is such a gift. Hope the rest of the trip goes exceptionally well!
I'm hopping on a flight to CT tonight and staying at the M. Nelson when I get there! Hope the weather stays fine….
http://reluctantmemsahib.wordpress.com
August 2, 2009have fun. keep warm! drink wine. x
Anonymous
August 2, 2009Turn it around – how wonderful you're all in the same city thousands of miles away from home and how awful it would be if you were alone in London. Celebrate the beauty around you and send positive lovely thoughts to your gorgeous children – and if you can be that Christian to your ex and his 'friend'! It will all come back to you and lift your heart. Your time with your father is extremely precious and a very rare gift. Enjoy!
Fat, frumpy and fifty...
August 2, 2009how weird this must be for you all..
family affairs
August 2, 2009Thanks for your comments guys and all good – I have turned it around. Can't worry it's too awful if I think about it too hard, so best to focus on all other stuff. Lx