I KNEW something was wrong. I didn’t sleep again the night before last, tossed and turned and listened to my pounding heart and kept thinking, why am I so worried about my 18 year old son’s future career? We can sort something out. What is the problem? But then I got that call, the one that explains your fear and suddenly everything else pales into a very different sort of perspective because all you want is for them all to still be alive.
Just every parents nightmare. I had a call at 9.00am from one of the mother’s of the boys inter-railing with my son. There are six of them travelling around Europe together. She said:-
“Have you heard?”
“No – heard what?”
“There’s been an incident”
Heart stops. Fear. Cold sweats. Hairs up on the back of my neck.
“What sort of incident?”
“A fight. They all got into a fight in a bar”
“Are they all OK?”
“I don’t know…no…not really”
They’re in Krakow, Poland. That’s all I know. What has happened? Where do you start? Then all her words just merged into a terrifying frenzy of panic:-
“one of them has been glassed in the face…eye…blood everywhere… ambulance …stitches ..police …four of them have been arrested…detention centre … assault charges … no phones … can’t talk to them …others in hospital…
and so on.
I called my son. Phone off. I called his father, my ex husband and we kept each other updated all day, tried to piece together what happened and formulate some sort of plan of attack. Jumbled messages came in all morning. I spoke to other parents. Suddenly we had Consul people involved, friends on the ground who were able to find out some information for us and all day I tried not to be sick, tried not to fear the worst. Tried to get a balance between one of the dad’s near total lack of concern because everything would be fine, they’d definitely be released to thoughts of “Midnight Express”. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
After a long long day of panic the plan was that his father was going to fly out. Find translators. Speak to the police. See what was to happen next.
But at 7pm my ex called me to let me know one of them had been released and that they were proposing to release them all in 35 minute intervals. I called the father of the released boy and told him the news – he hadn’t heard and I said “hooray! At least you know he’s safe” and he said “I will not be happy until they are all released. They are in this together. They are a team, but thanks for letting me know”.
Five minutes later he called me back. “Have you heard?” he said. “No. What?”.
Panic again.
“They’ve all been released”.
I can’t tell you that feeling of relief. It makes you want to cry.
Son called 10 minutes later. Sounded absolutely fine. More grown up in fact. Told me about the incident and again it all merged, this time into a blurry haze of relief that everyone is OK. One of his friend’s has 26 stitches in his face, but his eye is fine. 26 STITCHES!! Who the fuck glasses people in the face. Despicable.
mum, it wasn’t our fault….bar..glassed my friend….but then the attacker nearly died because he managed to sever an artery in his wrist with one of the shards of glass…police were fine…they knew it wasn’t our fault….we’re all OK…what?…dad’s coming out!….GOOD ONE MUM!….seriously?….it’s all been blown out of proportion…OK I’ll call him….no, of course we’re not all coming home…we’re carrying on…everyone is fine….don’t worry….don’t worry….
Daughter adds but I only vaguely hear her …”this might be a good time to tell you that he’s had an eyebrow piercing mum”….yes, very good time, don’t give a shit, very, very good timing, I will probably care tomorrow, but today (only today), he can cover his entire body in whatever he wants as long as he comes back safely.
Sometimes, I really really hate being a mother. You have to wear your heart on the outside most of the time anyway, but at times like this it’s as if somebody is slicing it up into little bits. I wish there was a way we could protect them all more effectively. “Here is my arm, my son, wear it well, it will protect you against the dark forces”. But you can’t (which is probably a relief because we would both look stupid). You just have to hope and pray to something or someone that they will be looked after and then send up little imaginary cotton wool protectors for them all to wear AT ALL TIMES.
Be safe.
Be safe.
Be safe.
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23 Comments
thank GOD lulu!!!! what a frikken NIGHTMARE…! jesus man….glad all ok though…but still….eesh. . .have a stiff drink or three why dontcha….yeah. shitty being a parent in times like these….so so relieved to know all ok… lots love and stay strong… XXX j
Yup no food and a glass of wine was enough yesterday to tip me 0ver the edge x
How scary! Glad he is okay!
Wow, they are super super lucky. Even the kid with the stitches. Hope they stay safe for the rest of the trip. They should be careful in the Eastern European states… they really hate young British males since the stag-do culture has given all young British males a bad-rep.
I know v v careful they need to be x
Good grief! Every parents dread, relieved Lauren is being packed straight off to uni…..
I agree. Can’t think why I agreed to this. Lx
Crumbs, that must have been terrifying. So wish we could protect them under our wings forever. And no matter how old they are, that worry never goes away (so my mum says anyway and I’m 39!).
I’m so glad he’s ok.
Thank you. So so terrifying. Honestly never been so scared in all my life actually Lx
Right – that’s it. The Queenager is coming home from college this minute. I can’t stand it. I wish I hadn’t read this. (Not really, but you know what I mean.)
Glad he’s OK.
I think the phrase “If you EVER..” should be used the next time you talk to him.
I know. It’s just so scary, but she will be fine – she’s a girl. They don’t get into these sort of scraps in the same way (I hope) Lx
Nightmare, sending love and gin xxx
Love your gin emergency packs – SO many of them now x
Wow. Horrific. But well done on your son for handling it all so well!
OMG Lulu heart attack time…… isnt youth wonderful they have scary adventures you die a million times and then they carry on giving the frantic parents a passing pitying glance. Thank God it was all ok and I bet whatever he says he must have been scared but hes a male and they have to show bravado. Large alcoholic drink in order I think. Never underestimate a mothers intuition!! XX
Oh my god, so thankful they are OK, although my heart goes out to the one with the scarred face and his family. Not happy hearing stories like this with our precious girl about to do a similar trip. I agree girls don’t generally get into fights, but there are different dangers for them. Thinking of you xx
So scary, glad he is OK.
I know that it wasn’t funny at the time, but because everything is fine I can tell you that it reminded me of the youtube Gap Yah video you posted a year ago: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKFjWR7X5dU
(“I am kind of in prison…”)
Oh yes, he’s very funny Lx
How awful – I’m glad that they are all ok (and in way that they are carrying on – I imagine this will become the stuff of legend in 20 years whilst you’ll still be dealing with the grey hairs it created)
OMG! I can’t imagine how you felt waiting to hear if all was okay. I have to stop reading your blog now. I have enough worries about a 7 year old, but it seems to get worse as they get older. Glad all alright now and hope he enjoys the rest of his trip, incident free.
I know. Sorry to worry you! Lx
ahh bugger, what a lot of worry. hopefully, whilst he is sounding slightly blase, the whole ordeal might be one that calms him and steadys him through the rest of life. Can’t imagine how bad you felt, counting down the days until he comes home now x I hate that ‘want to kill ’em/hug ’em’ juxtaposition. Love to you.
What a worry that must have been. Glad to hear that he is okay 🙂