BIRTHDAY WEEK

I have failed in my task to merge my birthday week celebrations with sensible professional adult behaviour.

I am a mess.  I have almost lost my voice.  I have had two business meetings in the last 10 years both of which were this week.  I have had a hangover during both of them and must have looked and sounded awful.

Last night I disgraced myself at our local pub by trying to look like Carla Bruni.  This required taking two halves of a Krispy Creme doughnut and putting one into each side of my mouth and then attempting to mould them into attractive looking cheek implants.  In my alcoholic fantasy I was about to save women a fortune.  What could be better than having donuts stuck in your mouth all day long AND look chiselled.  Anyway, the photos this morning tell a completely different story.  I looked more like Bernard Manning.  Not only that but I then spent half an hour trying to swallow the bloody thing and remove lots of sticky sugar from my face.

Thank you to my lovely friends who made me a donut cake and sang me “Happy Birthday” and generally allowed me to feel hugely important and special.

Now I have to go and do it all again tonight with my old college friends.

Oh no.