Apparently modern families spend less than 40 minutes a day together during the week. That’s not very much is it. Although if my son had his way he’d shave off another 38 minutes and be happy with a quick two minute catch up on a daily basis before wandering out the door to school, see friends, play football, eat something, watch TV, play a computer game and/or look at his phone – basically do anything rather than spend time talking to his mother. My daughter spends more time talking to me, but then again that might be because she’s on crutches and I can follow her around the house insisting she talk to me because she can’t escape unless I agree to give her a ride somewhere.
I do try and ensure we get some “quality” time together in the kitchen in between episodes of “Friends”. We do always eat together, even if there isn’t a lot of lively discussion, so I can’t honestly say that I always get the update I want about what is going on with their lives.
Almost a third of 2,000 parents polled by Hollywood Bowl even blame their family’s reliance on technology as a reason for the lack of quality time they get to spend together and I’m quite sure if you asked my children they would have something to say about my commitment to my computer, so I am probably just as much to blame. More than three in ten parents say their kids would rather play computer games than have a family conversation or take part in a family activity.
However, many recognise this is a problem, with 83 per cent claiming they want to make more of an effort to spend quality time together as a family.
Liz Penney, spokesperson for Hollywood Bowl, said: “Getting time together as a family is difficult, it’s a shame to see just how little quality time parents and their children are spending together, without the distractions of day-to-day life interfering.
“A worrying trend to emerge is the influence our heavy reliance on electronic devices is having on the lack of quality time we spend with our loved ones, as even when we are all at home together, chances are, much of that time will be spent with children and parents staring at a screen.
“It’s important to ensure that we spend time interacting with loved ones and have some time away from the technology that dominates modern life.”
“Whether that means getting out of the house and enjoying an activity together, or really interacting with one another at home, children grow up fast, so it is important that we make more time to engage in fun activity together and not just interact with screens.
The ‘Hollywood Bowl Family Fun’ report was designed to understand how much time the British family actually spends interacting together as well as reveal the significance parents place on these moments.
The study found that while we can expect to enjoy 38 minutes of quality time on a weekday, things don’t really improve at the weekend with it rising to just three hours and 10 minutes of quality time on each day.
Household chores were named as the biggest barrier to spending time together as a family, accounting for more than 11 hours of our time each week, along with long working hours.
A further hour of each week is taken up with parents ferrying their children to after school activities and clubs – but to be honest, I always found that the time spent in the car was great talking time because they are well and truly stuck and don’t have to look at me when I discuss key issues. Sometimes I even lock the doors and drive really fast so they can’t leap out at traffic lights.
This is why it’s important to take holidays as a family – because they are well and truly stuck and can’t escape. I find this is most satisfactory and we have mucho time to argue together as a team and share the experience.
It also emerged more than two in five parents worry they don’t spend enough quality time with their children, which is a great shame. I do think if you can you should try and make sure that you are around during some of the day time during the week even if you are working from home.
Eating out at restaurants together is the most popular choice of activity, followed by going for a walk in the countryside, playing board games and going to the park and I would concur with the restaurants – it’s our favourite choice of thing to do together, whilst walking in the countryside is something that I can only get them to agree to once a year on Mother’s Day. Otherwise they simply refuse on account of it’s the most boring thing to do in the world. Playing board games is my fault because I loathe games on the whole. Only at Christmas time will I agree to play games. Going to the park? They’re too old. Pub maybe, but not park. Cooking also works quite well and so do birthdays when I insist we all hang out together.. but mainly, the key is, don’t stress about it. The more you insist on time together, the less time they want to spend with you.
I’m going to review an ice-cream parlour at the weekend and I can guarantee I’m going to see some interest from my children in wanting to join me….
