There was an article in the paper yesterday about how the number of couples hiding assets from one another in a divorce settlement has increased by 100% since last year, “which is staggering” a lawyer in a matrimonial practice was quoted as saying.
I have come to realise that this is not remotely “staggering” and has clearly been going on for years. I know a number of men who have confessed to me that they hid significant assets from their wives just before having to disclose all their assets. (I even know of one that squirreled away thousands of pounds over the years and kept the cash in a shoe box). Of course they did. Nobody parts with their money easily. I have even heard that certain companies now look at how they can protect their employees assets should they divorce and can offer different options for the way in which you can get paid. It is obviously not just the men who can lie about financial issues when a marriage breaks down, but the article did quote that 88% involved men being dishonest during matrimonial disclosure, compared to 2% of women. 10% of couples were equally devious. They don’t even mention the parents of these couples. Those that ensure any inheritance or lump sums are well protected should a couple split up.
The recent high profile divorce cases have merely served to highlight the problem and it is clear that men (in particular) are panicking about how to protect their money. Therefore, don’t be surprised to find that a lot of time and planning has gone into the shifting of capital prior to a divorce. The money can go into trust funds and offshore accounts, into property in somebody else’s name, into parents accounts, or other third parties name, or simply be given to a mate for safe keeping. In my experience, and trust me I was more naive than most when I started, you need to keep your eyes open and don’t be fooled. By the time you are the dividing up the heirlooms it can be a dirty game that is being played.
I suppose pre-nuptial agreements are the way forward. Not for me though. It’s love or nothing.
A Mother's Place is in the Wrong
March 12, 2008I agree, Lulu, it’s a very sad state of affairs. My Ex literally changed overnight into the meanest possible person (in every way), and changed all his allegiances too. My friends have also had similar experiences; it’s awful when you consider that it’s always (or mostly) the wife who ends up poorer and bringing up the children to boot. M xx
zoe
March 13, 2008I agree 100%. My Ex got me to sign for the purchase of our house at 9pm the night before our wedding. I should have thought this odd, but the solicitor stayed in his office until it was done.
As we didn’t have a pre-nup, this meant (in this country), that however much my Ex signed for was his (2/3 of the house) and the amount that I could put towards the house was mine.
Fair enough.
BUT.
I’ve been living in this house since June ’99, have paid for every single bill including property tax etc, the up-keep of the house and in 2 year’s time the house will be sold off. Fair enough, I get the first offer – but I STILL have to pay my Ex the 2/3 of the house that he ‘owns’.
I should note that while we were together I paid my share towards the house throughout. Fair? No.
Pre-nups are the only way into marriage these days. 🙁