In amongst little golden nuggets of wonderfulness with regard to my children, I have had a shit week. I can’t write about any of it because I have had the equivalent of an invisible super injunction gagging order taken out on my blog owing to who is now reading it, which has rendered me virtually mute.
Last Thursday, during a long and tedious evening for my youngest sons football presentation (well, I’m allowed to be jaded, I’ve sat through 13 years of them so far) I finally had a meeting with my ex husband to discuss his various issues. The blog being one of them.
So I can’t really tell you that he thinks my blog is “grubby” and “self indulgent” and full of “e-wank” (what IS that?). I can’t tell you that he told me it is entirely inappropriate to write about our children or that he thought the whole thing was dull and suburban and frankly a total waste of time and that his new wife thinks……well, he decided not to tell me what she thinks because it would only wind me up. He did say he’d only read it once and I suggested that perhaps he should read more, it might give him a different perspective on our situation, but he was most certainly not going to do that.
I can’t tell you which issues to do with our children I got blamed for or why he’s furious with Builder Bloke.
I came away feeling upset and deflated. There are lots and lots of wonderful things about our children that of course I am not given any credit for. It’s just a constant battering I seem to get every time we meet and I don’t frankly know why I bother to put myself through it.
It would also be inappropriate to tell you that I got a bit too drunk at my 18 year olds football presentation night in a pub on Friday (owing to a horrid experience at the dentist where I had so much anaesthetic I lost control of even my tongue for a number of hours, which meant I hadn’t eaten). Which meant that when I was asked to say a few words quite late in the evening on behalf of the parents I’m not sure I did the best job ever. All I was supposed to say was “Thank you on behalf of the parents” and I forgot that bit. Waffled on about all manner of other things. Can’t quite be sure what but I know that I talked about the incredible bond the boys had developed over the years and that they would, as a result no doubt be friends forever.
Neither can I tell you that my son, as Captain made a brilliantly funny speech and then, with the support of his trusty mate, took down his trousers to display shiny new tattoos with their football club name on their right butt cheeks. Honestly, should I be worried he’s got a tattooing addiction? NO space left on his bottom.
Neither can I tell you about the brush with police some of the boys had later and the cab journey I had to take at 1am to sort it all out.
Neither can I tell you about the argument I had with Builder Bloke.
Anyway. So what to talk about?
My youngest son’s award for Best Sportmanship? How proud was I:-
Or that this is what it’s all about sometimes, getting a little bit tipsy with your family and being there at important moments – so does it really matter that I’d had a bit too much to drink? I texted the father of one of the boys whose mother died a few years ago to tell him that he HAD to come to see him receive an award. He did. Shame I didn’t do the same for my sons father. He didn’t turn up. What a pity. He missed a brilliant evening:-
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27 Comments
So I suppose I’m not allowed to comment on your not being allowed to tell us, either?!
That is probably best xx
i can’t believe this lulu!? sorry but its outrageous…i think you should continue to write what you goddamn like here..it doesn’t belong to them and it’s a free world. you’ve NEVER mentioned anyones names…it’s also a place where other people going through similar things can learn from and not feel alone with all the shit….sorry. but your blog is one of my FAVOURITES. it’s what got me going in the first place. you are an amazing writer and blogger….keep at it..don’t stop..and don’t be muted…no ways! honestly. what a to do….lots love xxx j oh and WELL DONE TO YOUR FIRST BORN! FANTASTIC! xxx
Thanks darling. – lovely that you are the first to comment …. you’ve got me through a lot of this stuff thus far!! Lx
Well done, 18 year old! Talk about pride and joy!
Seriously, not to have your blog would be a huge disappointment. I’ve browsed around many other blogs and none so far compare to yours. A bit of a bias I certainly have, but that only takes you so far.
It is the quality of the writing, the humour, the cultural events, the commenting community, and the website’s nice looks that make you want to go back every day.
Without it I would just read my e-mails, two thirds of which is spam, and political news, which can be worse than spam, because not so easily dismissed. Nothing comforting or funny about that.
I don’t think that anyone can stop you from doing what you love. You are a public good now.
Aaah thanks – public goods?? Lx
I’m sorry, my darling, but nobody has the right to censor you (unless, as you say, there’s some kind of superinjunction barring you). You don’t name names, and nobody knows who you are (well, I do, but you know what I mean). Bollocks to them.
Thx darling – how was Dubai?? `lx
Have been away and only just caught up so Like Working Mum I feel I better not comment!!!!! but I tell you there is no way No2 is not reading this avidly every day she is human I suppose?????God how hard it must be not to big up a few things particularly regarding BB. Actually I dont know how you are remaining so calm about what is after all ‘your’ blog’. Sod off is one of the milder phrases I would have used to anyone trying to tell me how to regulate my content. I admire you tho for ‘not talking’ about so much:0) Sounds like it was a good weekendx
Thx hun x
Have loved your blog, found it helpful, funny, raw, honest and courageous and yes at times, self indulgent and dull (but only when I feel you are not writing instinctively) but it is REAL and your children, when they are old enough to care will be so proud of you so the idea that anyone should want to prevent you from doing this is outrageous.
I LOVE yr honesty – ” at times self indulgent and dull”???? Ok, I accept what you say and it’s fine Lx
said it before, say it again : I never thought you have blogged anything inappropriate about the children but you probably have to understand blogging to understand. I’m very sorry it’s been a majority shite week but it sounds like the Presentations made up for it and hey, the listeners were probably all too the wrong side of sober to realise that you were also the right side of letting yourself relax 🙂 Cool Trophy.
Ps I didn’t say any of that.
Thank u for your repeat support and as u say, relaxing is all good Lx
Oh dear… did he ever admit that his wife was “good mum”? oh yeah you probably can’t say. There’s a few things I would like to say, but I don’t want to at the moment. Apart from good luck, try to ignore him and tell him to get on with his life instead of messing around with yours. Also, well done to your son – that’s a great trophy to have won! 🙂
Wife said she wasn’t Good Mum” so I have no idea xx
Keep on blogging! You’ve obviously rattled several people’s cages and why not? If you stopped blogging these people would think they’ve won – don’t give them that pleasure.
OK thanks DD – anyway, I have to, it’s in the blood now!! Lx
For f’s sake, does this woman not have a life? Can you bring an injunction against her for harrassment? I suppose it just shows how happy and content she is in her new marriage.
Bugger it, just talk through the lawyers. See how much he likes it when the dollars are going in legal fees. Unfortunately so would yours. Maybe he’ll realise how lucky he is to have an ex-wife with a conscious, not a gold digger.
Do whatever you have to do mate, you’re in my prayers.
Love the trophy, Well done to your son, my daughter is a bit hard to motivate sports wise as she has her mother’s co-ordination (that of a spastic gnat!) so getting these rewards are so special, it keeps them going. And don’t worry about tats on the butt, at least he can cover them! My dad had a grade A rump beef stamp on his butt. He was in the navy.
It’s only in my head that there is a gagging order – just feel restrained about what to write. Nothing legal. Thankfully Lx
Honestly didn’t mean to offend you (see above) Please concentrate on the other things I said.
You didn’t offend – it’s fine. Really. and you did say some other lovely things Lx
If he really thinks your blog is a load of ‘e-wanlk’ (brilliantly pretentious phrase by the way!) then who’s the biggest ‘loser’. You for writing it, or him for using his extremely valuable time reading it and getting all worked up?
I have ot say, I feel he is more of a traditional wanker! (sorry!!)
Have you heard that expression before?? Lx
Love your blog just the way it is…. hope it doesn’t change!! There are scared and small minded people everywhere, can’t give in to them. What good would that do!
How about suggesting Good Mum (ha!) starts her own blog?! That might mean she has a bit less time to poke about in yours …. I can’t believe that your ex is stooping to censorship now. I really hope you don’t stop as I love the way you write, but on the other hand I know full well how exhausting these fights with exes are…. selfishly I hope you continue anyway. Sending big hugs xx
Thank you lovely Lxx