Hmmm. If it is indeed the season to be jolly, why is it that I keep wanting to tell everyone (only in my head you understand) to f*ck off? I’m already feeling massively stressed AND THERE ARE STILL DAYS TO GO! BUT NOT ENOUGH DAYS LEFT TO GET EVERYTHING DONE!! EVEN WORSE is that tomorrow is my son’s TWENTY FIRST BIRTHDAY so I’ve got to massively focus on that first and make sure he has an amazing day, but I AM A LITTLE FREAKED OUT THAT MY CHILD IS SO OLD and how can that have happened – he was only teeny and in my arms maybe like ten years ago? Surely no more than that.
I am marginally feeling like I’m standing alone in a crowded room. Not sure why that is…guess that’s how I always feel when I’m single and there is nothing worse than feeling like that at Christmas time – no matter how many times I try and talk myself out of it by telling myself I’m being shallow and ridiculous, there it is…I just really don’t want to do Christmas day on my own. It’s bad enough with not having my father around and therefore my mother is will be on her own….but still, nothing to be done about that and really it will be a wonderful day. I’VE GOT TWELVE PEOPLE COMING FOR THE DAY!! OMG. Lots of people who are not in a couple either so it will almost be normal – not in the least dysfunctional.
STILL. One thing I do know is to not beat myself up about how much there is to do and to make life as easy as possible. My fridge makes me happy. Look at this, I have no qualms in confessing that this year it will be Christmas courtesy of M & S (and this is not a sponsored post and anyway I hate brussel sprouts). Easy peasy:-