“AAAAARGH” was what the email from his teacher said the other day when I had to tell him that my son had changed his mind about his future career at the very last moment. It has meant that he has had to completely rewrite his personal statement which has been a nightmare for everybody concerned. How do you sum up your life in one A4 bit of paper to stand out from anybody else’s life?
This has added to quite a lot of stress this weekend. Had been wondering why I am feeling a little rung out this Monday morning, but I think if I do a breakdown of where we all are, it will perhaps become a little more clear.
Eight children sleeping here on Saturday night (nine including Builder Bloke) and me. My house is in total and utter chaos.
TEENAGE SON
Badly injured in his rugby game on Saturday. Hurt the shoulder again that he had his operation on and has got a “dead leg”. Very upset therefore that he couldn’t go to the inter-schools football trials he’d been invited to attend. Stressed about his university applications and what he’s going to do AND loads of homework/partying/drinking/work/life/home balance to deal with very badly.
TEENAGE DAUGHTER
Gorgeous but hormonal. Just coping with new levels of work for GCSE’s but the ART – OMG so much work for her to do – and she hasn’t got that right yet. It’s meant a lot of stress about getting everything else done. She’s very emotional about her father’s new situation as well at the moment.
10 YEAR OLD
I am really really feeling for him. New school. New situation with his father getting married. Not good that we are arguing over whether he can stay the night with his father during the school week now he’s moved so far away and it’s a lot for his little head. Poor kid. He’s a bit up and down. This is when I really hate divorce and the mess we’ve made for them. I wonder if children from separated parents end up believing they have a choice about where to live and what school to go to because the parents are no longer able to present a united front. Kids need boundaries. Still he is on the whole enjoying his new school – although off sick today which isn’t a good sign.
He’s got a lot of extra homework to do than he has been used to – I have little bits of mouldy bread dotted all about the house in varying states of decay and he’s trying to plot graphs and stuff when he’s never seen a graph before….I was very pleased to hear he’s doing so well in his spelling tests – he isn’t great at spelling and suddenly he’s coming top of the class. However, when I checked it seems the reason for that is that he has been allowed to mark his own tests…..not good.
BUILDER BLOKE AND HIS CHILDREN
Thank god BB seems to be the only one who is happy and calm at the moment. He thinks the reason that everybody is a little jumpy at the moment is because of the new world order of his ex wife and my ex husband getting married and that things will settle down eventually. Given that he was the one initially who was so irrational it is very interesting to see that he is now the one who is the most calm of all. Phew. His kids all were very happy this weekend – he is just in heaven when he’s got his children – putting a ridiculous new sound system into his 18 year old’s car and planning a stupid sized exhaust.
EX HUSBAND
I am not sure what to do. We are not getting along at all well. All the business about having our youngest son to stay the night last week was a nightmare. Not sure whether to ignore or meet to talk about it. I can’t allow it to affect the children so perhaps talking is a better option. I’m going to suggest that we try some family mediation with lawyers present to sort all our current problems out. I don’t want to have to go back to court and I’m happy to try and reach a compromise that works for everybody. He has taken on a lot – it must all be a bit of a nightmare for him.
CATS
Still alive
FISH
Recently acquired and all still alive which is very good news.
NEWS FLASH: 2 dead as of this morning. No idea what happened. Son shouted for me to come “MUM, is it normal for Sellotape and Sticky to be sleeping at the bottom of the tank with their eyes closed? Oh dear.
saz
October 11, 2010lu, make sure your compromise is that…I have always thought l have been a great compromiser, rational and just….NOT a bit of it…I have always settled and settle l will not….no longre..by settling, our relationship was compromised’…
you say…’He has taken on a lot – it must all be a bit of a nightmare for him’..WTF!! and that was and is his choice, don’t you dare go getting sympathetic….
and I do believe by always putting the children first logistically..isnt the best thing….of course you have their best interests at heart….just sometimes…we can;t see the wood for the trees…..and just sometimes, I have swallowed hard and asked my best pals and sometimes they put me straight..
saz x
Family Affairs
October 11, 2010Thanks saz….for the reminder, as a friend. Lx
G
October 12, 2010Seeing as it’s the only bit I have any experience in;
I wouldn’t worry about your eldest, changing his mind over uni at this point is absolutely fine. A year ago I was about to apply for Psychology but after really thinking about it I ended up doing American Studies. I didn’t finish my personal statement until the end of December. At the end of the day it’s far more important he finds a course he really wants to do and can stick with for 3 or 4 years, even if that means he has to take a Gap Year.
Just my humble opinion, but my year off and taking the time to really assess my options for uni helped me no end, and I reckon that’s why I’m enjoying it so much now.
Family Affairs
October 12, 2010Thanks G – thats very good to hear – so plesaed you’re enjoying your course and it’s all worked out so well. Keep in touch!! I love that I have got my first comment from a male student (even if I do know you personally!) ! Lx
Jon Storey
October 12, 2010Lauren’s Personal Statement went off to UCAS last night, The Children’s Mother has spent the last 48hrs in a darkened room with only a bottle of gin for company……
Family Affairs
October 12, 2010I know the feeling – I should be in there with her……but still working on it – deadline tomorrow Lx